McCain? McCain? McCain?

Ben Stein, who starred in the legendary movie “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”, is giving out advice for the McCain campaign. Stein, the Republican economist, offered a few simple ideas to get McCain’s campaign back on the ground.

“First,” Stein said in a voice that bored the reporter to sleep, “McCain should change his party affiliation from Republican to Democrat. Second, he should change his name from ‘McCain’ to something less Republican sounding. Maybe something like ‘McClinton’. Third, he should probably stop referring to countries that don’t exist any more. Finally, it may help if he could make himself look a little younger. He looks like a bowl of moldy oatmeal right now and that won’t go well with voters. Most people hate oatmeal and mold, so combining the two together just compounds the problem. Oh, and if none of those work, he may just want to adopt all of Obama’s positions. Those seem to be pretty popular right now.”