BREAKING NEWS: They tried to make me go to the wedding chapel.. I said yes yes
Posted by cragrant on June 29, 2008
Every now & then when the celebs are in rehab & everything else is going slow here in the U.S.A., Royters turn to that little island that gave birth to us that we have now put in the retirement home were they belong.
Prince William the son of the late Princess Di, whose death was only out shone on US cable news with the death of Anna Nicole Smith & Tim Russert, recently turned 26. Many rumors have been swirling that Prince William will marry his long time girlfriend Kate Middleton. Our British freelance photographer, Kitty, got these exclusive photos to show that Wills’ true love is Amy Winehouse.
The shocking news of the two timing Prince led Kate Middleton to fly down to South Africa to confront Amy Winehouse at Mandela’s birthday celebration. Kate English Rose Middleton fucked Amy Winehouse up. These events caused the Prince to come forward with the truth of his love for the troubled & ill singer. The Prince sent out this statement:
Amy & I are lovers. She has gone through a lot & I love her no matter what illness or drugs she has or will face tomorrow. I meet Amy through our love of water polo & baby mice. When the obstacles are out of our way we will marry & have beautiful babies.
This caused a fury at Buckingham Palace considering Amy Winehouse is married to her jailed husband & more importantly is Jewish. Some people are embracing this love story. They have already made the engagement tea cups.
Good luck, my British brethren! I wish you nothing but the best in your marriage and a quality supply of designer drugs!
P.S. Wills, get her tested STAT!
P.P.S. Amy, you may want to lay off the drugs. It gets hard to stop using once you get preggers. I know.
Malach the Merciless said
Wow, He will be dead in a matter of weeks
AngryMan said
I can’t wait until this wedding preempts coverage of the presidential debates this fall!
C.Rag said
So why do I only have two commentors?
What does no one thinks this is real?
Or do they have too much sympathy for Amy Wino?
Buzzardbilly said
Imagine the after-wedding party for that union! I’ll bet the just light the coast of France great huge urns of crack and use fans to blow the brain-fying fumes to the entire kingdom. Then Amy will collapse into the champaigne waterfall when her emphysema reacts to the crack smoke and die before the marriage is consumated, leaving Wills to be eligible to marry his true love, Graham Norton, in California.
Buzzardbilly said
PS: Her face in those pics looks like someone just stuck a stiff-bristled brush up her pooper.
C.Rag said
Buzz,
I think she lost her crack pipe because it’s stuck in her pooper.